How to make time for yourself

What happens when we live in the cycle of feeling like everyone’s needs and wants come before our own? When you don’t know how to make time for yourself you may notice these things:

• Resentment towards others 
• Bitterness that you are always doing things for others
• Overwhelm at daily tasks
• Exhaustion
• Stress 
• Being unsure of your identity (who I am is only in context of someone else- someone’s mom, wife, employee, etc)

The problem is, not only do we not have our own needs and wants met, but we are also not able to fully show up for the people that mean the most to us. This is something that I know firsthand because I lived it for the majority of my adult life. We cannot best serve the people that we love when we are last on our priority list.

When I learned to let this go and to start allowing myself to have needs and wants, expressing them and allowing them to be met, every single part of my life got better. The relationships in my life, my job, my physical health, mental health, spiritual health- EVERYTHING!!

This was something that I had to do slowly, and the very first thing that I did was start meditating and journaling in the morning. Before I did anything for anyone else. It took 20 minutes, but the difference it made in my life was huge!

Some common areas that people have trouble in:

• Sleep
  • getting to sleep at the time they want
  • staying asleep through the night
• Nutrition
  • meal planning prepping
  • making dinner
• Working out
  • making a plan
  • sticking to a plan
• Stress
  • not taking breaks from being “on”
  • dealing with stress in a helpful way
• Having time for hobbies or fun
  • If your idea of hobbies or fun involves going to your kid’s basketball games or carpooling people- you need to read this!!

How to create a plan that will work for you:

The way you have your day set up currently, you may not have time, but there is always time to do the things that are a priority. Your thoughts matter. So, start with changing your thought that will help you instead of hold you back. Instead of “I don’t have time” to ” I make time for what is a priority.”

Here’s where to start:

• Do a time audit of your day
  • it’s often surprising to see how much time we spend on social media, checking email, scrolling mindlessly
  • by doing a time audit, you can see in real time how to consolidate things and move tasks around
  • use that time to do something that is going to make you feel replenished
• Ask for help
  • take turns with someone picking kids up from school so that you have 30 minutes to yourself
  • switch off with your partner putting kids to bed
  • have your kids clean the kitchen after dinner, and use that time to read or take a bath
  • there are usually a lot of people in our life that will help, if we only ask
• Wake up earlier- filling your cup before you start pouring out to everyone else can help your day seem lighter and more joyful
  • set your alarm just 15 minutes earlier
  • grab your coffee or tea and read a book, journal, or whatever sounds good to you.
• Say no
  • whenever you say yes to something, you are saying no to something else
  • if your first response when you are asked to help with something is “yes”, change it to- “I need to look at my schedule and see if that will work for me.” And really see what it will mean to commit to something else.
• If you are wanting some more support around this, schedule a consultation with me. We can spend 1-hour figuring out how to create more time in your day- or whatever else you are needing help around.

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